Sexual Bondage

Of the fetishes out there, Doms and Subs relationships are the ones I have trouble understanding the most.  But only because there is a complex depth to the lifestyle I’ve never delved into. In the past couple of years, the D/s stories have exploded, and are perhaps the best selling stories out there.  It is a complex world that deserves justice when it’s portrayed, and I hope to one day create a worthy story.

Bondage plays a heavy role in BDSM, with it being used a sexual stimulant and have a feature in sexual fantasies.  The submissive is dressed usually in clothing that depicts passiveness or innocence while the Dom is dressed in something that gives the image of authority or control.  Equipment can include ropes, straps, harnesses, bars, X-frames, handcuffs, ties, or anything else that can restrict movement.  The person applying the restraints is usually knowledgeable, or should be, especially when using suspension lifts and ties.

But what is the emotion behind the lifestyle of D/s?  Outsiders like to point out that the submissives like to be hurt, that they enjoy the pain or humiliation, but truthfully, it’s the exchange of power between the two partners, the trust behind it that stimulates the sexual experience.  Mutual respect is important.  Safe words are used in order to give submissives a small amount of control, in case the Dom oversteps the boundary of pain or emotions.     

When the term “erotica” comes into play, most ordinary people automatically think BDSM, leather, whips, chains and masks.  They don’t understand the deeply complex partnership that D/s enter into, contracts that are made, and trust that is given.  While there are many out there that cater for the intense, occasional one night stand with being dominated, the true lifestyle is so much more.