10 March 2014

Topic Tuesday - Difficult Words

What is the most difficult thing you've ever had to tell someone? How did you prepare yourself? How did it go over? Good? Bad? Indifferent? Would you have done anything different? And why was it important for you to get right?

Well, this is a depressing topic.  Some might have better answers than I, but I can only think of two times in my life that I had difficulty telling someone something.  First, when my marriage was breaking apart and I didn’t want to try to fix it.  Saying those words to my (then) husband were so hard, and I had to get them right.  I didn’t want there to be any misunderstanding that I wanted out.  Luckily, he was of the same mind but still, it hurts when a marriage doesn’t work.

The second time is when my father died and I was the one who had to tell everyone.  This is still raw for me because he died two years ago, in a hospital, where the doctor basically came out and told us he’d never recover.  My father didn’t want to be on life support but he did want to live, and when my siblings and I made the decision that life support would be terminated, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to face.  I had four hours to be with my father, hold his hand, and try to tell him everything in my heart.  It was so important that I tell him everything and when he took his last breath, I was the one who called time. 

My stepmother asked me to write the obit for the paper.  That was when my words had to be perfect and I sat and agonized over that for a very long time.  I don’t know what life has in store for me yet but I hope nothing so sad as these two. 
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1 comment:

  1. ((Beth)) those are both rough. My post for this topic last week was also about divorce, well actually just separation. I however was too hurt to bring any of the maturity that it sounds like you did. Wow, writing your father's obit; I can't imagine doing that